my latest bad habit.

as of late, i've been stuck at the gym longer than i'd ever want to be (e.g., more than 28 seconds) due to my gross absorption into some random show on the tvs there. tonight, it was celebrity family feud (seeing the cast of the office made me yearn for the return of primetime). even worse, on saturday, it was a lifetime MOVIE. it sucks to not want to leave your elliptical machine for TWO HOURS in order to see how a teenage couple who got married at 18, work out the trials and tribulations of him working construction to pay the bills and her going to harvard (naturally).

i'm pretty sure i smelled funny after hour 1.

the one woman campaign for sterilization.

this is a snippet from baby borrowers, where young adults try to fathom what it's like to have a baby by... borrowing them. in this scene, the girls have to wear pregnancy suits to a baby care class. drama ensues.



private to kelly from dunwoody, ga: you need to CHECK yo-self before you WRECK yo-self. i'm pretty sure you have to concede the right to throw tantrums once you bring a BABY into the world.

update: make that two women. i couldn't find supporting youtube documentation but if you make the poor decision to watch this show, i KNOW you will agree. fo realz.

i am at my most creative when procrastinating.

the number of different ways i have avoided packing thus far:

1. watched an entire season of veronica mars (again)
2. made this pasta dish for lunch
3. purchased and played ddr supernova 2
4. reciprocated facebook wall posts
5. shopped for new bedding
6. "cleaned up" the dvr queue by watching the season finales of the office, grey's, gossip girl & moonlight
   
7. uploaded, captioned and emailed vacation pictures
8. thought about taking up (subversive) cross-stitching
   
9. organized my firefox bookmarks
10. watched enchanted
11. figured out that the title to my car exists exactly nowhere
12. this, this, this, this, this and this
    

in my defense, this is the eighth move i've made in nine years, not including all of those layovers in nj where i mooched off my parents, which is precisely what i'll be doing again this summer like the proud mba grad that i am. i assure you everyone is mutually excited that the prodigal daughter returns. again.

just how much does my car hate me?

...so much so that it digested and regurgitated the drive belt completely of its own accord, thus rendering the cooling and power steering systems completely useless. in the middle of i-95. the mechanic literally went looking for the belt and just found a few strands left behind. and i'm pretty sure we ran over whatever it decided to eject. either that or a small animal. bastard (my car, that is).

i just needed like, FOUR MORE WEEKS. two of which i would be OUT OF TOWN. dear saaby, please DIAF. you totally usurped my graduation dress fund. BASTARD.

apologies, i clearly have serious issues with my soon to be abandoned car. THE BASTARD!

(pic source)

legally blind.

i was sitting in class trying to wipe some muck off of my glasses when all of a sudden one pair of glasses became two equal but distinct parts:

good thing that the rest of lecture focused on evaluating various print ads and watching a video. all i could tell was that they were shot in color. i definitely scored brownie points for class participation today with that searing insight.

then i had to (humiliatingly) text my friend to come find me for lunch because i had no chance of spotting her in a crowd without making a lot of people uncomfortable via personal space invasions.

at least i hope that's who that girl was.

finally, this reminds me of the best insulting compliment i've ever received:

wow, you look so weird without glasses!

thanks bitch. that's just my "weird" face you're talking about.

yuppie utopia under siege.

so i came home from lunch today to find four police cars outside my apartment building. then when i came home from the movies later in the day, i spotted multiple crying people, an unmarked police car and a crime scene unit stationwagon in addition to the aforementioned police presence.

my guess was armed robbery based on the need for the csu car and the relatively relaxed demeanor of the cops despite the visible trauma of others, but apparently i was wrong.

first, tornados and now death. i hope csi:durham has a counterpart to horatio caine.

if i-95 was a circle.

so wait. does this prove that bad driving is to blame for all of those fabricated traffic jams in virginia ...or not? because i'm going to get ridiculously angry and yell at someone either way.

(i was also going to make a bottleneck/fat kid in the goal/process improvement joke, but i abhored operations management SO MUCH that i now must retire to my happy place)

source.

i want my hour back.

i woke up, rolled out of bed and turned on the tv, only to find this on:

i became super stoked because this show airs on:

ergo, due to the transitive property, if i get make me a supermodel and make me a supermodel airs on bravo, then I MUST GET BRAVO. there is a (tv) god!

but alas, it was just my dopey, sleepy, ever-hopeful self watching. because apparently, the show is also now airing on oprah's non-oprah tv channel:
which just (cruelly) aired a commercial for the above show with the tag line: ONLY ON BRAVO.

what a fucking tease.

the bane of my existence lumbers on.

so it's bad when every time i have to do an assignment for my strategic modeling class (which, btw, is before every lecture), i instead spend the time trying to figure out how to withdraw from the class, right?

just checking.

meanwhile, i won't insult your intelligence with the ole you-know-you-watch-too-much-tv-when-you-watch-tv-shows-about-tv-
shows joke, but i ♥ the soup. seriously. joel mentioned that he has interns to watch the "crap" he doesn't like to watch.

honestly, HOW GREAT WOULD I BE AT THAT JOB? i do like, 88% of the work already for free.

(the missing 12% is due to the lack of bravo access)

just how cold is it today?

almost cold enough for me to wear this in public:


i know, you're jealous. and also wondering how i'm going to negotiate the logistics of wearing it with my other new headgear. i am also currently pondering this quandary.

anyway, it is seriously fucking freezing outside.

right now, m has "never been so exasperated".

all because our internet connection and cable box just died simultaneously.

(no but really, it was a scary four minutes as we waited to see if we had fallen victim to some bizarre cable-based apocalypse. we even began to make entertainment contingency plans like watching a billion episodes of veronica mars on dvd. yes, again.)

time warner, we're giving you the finger right... now.

the current bane of my existence.

not dropping a course about strategic modeling is just about the poorest decision i've made thus far in 2008.

i should have known to abort the mission the day we diagrammed causal feedback loops and stock-and-flow diagrams of the coke industry in the 1980s.

(that is, as in blow, and not as in the bane of pepsi's existence)

it reminds me of the summer i took pre-college courses at yale and signed up for astronomy because i thought i would learn all of the constellations besides orion's belt. imagine the slap to my face when the prof busted out some hardcore physics.

fucking parsecs and white dwarfs. (i am) SO LAME.