if the boobs don't fit, you must acquit.

here's the basic story:

• woman is jealous of her ex and his new gf.
• woman allegedly kicks a hole in his door and crawls through.
• woman gets convicted of b&e.
• woman's conviction is overturned when her 44-inch bust is found to be too big to fit through the door hole creating reasonable doubt, according to the presiding judge (for a rescue 911-esque dramatization, fast forward to 3:40 here).
• woman is quoted as saying, “i used to hate my body so much, but it was my breasts that won in court."

and what do you suppose said woman looks like?















(i know, i hate gimmicky scrolling too)









did that just blow your mind? cause there's NO CHANCE you were expecting to see a japanese woman right now. though honestly, nothing looks more natural than GIANT JUGGS on a petite asian lady.

meanwhile, just plummy has seriously taken a turn towards the soft porn today. apologies; i don't know what's up with that. apparently all of the good stories as of late involve boobies, i don't know.

(insert when-don't-they-involve-boobs joke here if you're fratty mcfratterson or al bundy)